My Bad Date – Overcoming Fear

I’ve been on plenty of dates. None of them were particularly terrible except for one. This date ended with a lingering hug that will haunt me until the day I die.

why do I bring this date up? Because it was a rock climbing date. I am afraid of heights. More on this later, of course.

Fear is our body’s natural response to a situation that seems threatening. And before I go any further, I would like to say that fear isn’t a bad thing. Fear is there to ensure our safety during times of trouble. Do not be afraid of fear. The best thing to do with it is to face it head on. When you’re face-to-face with fear, don’t back down and you will see yourself grow stronger.

For those of you who have issues with anxiety, my heart bleeds for you. I’m sorry you have to struggle with such a hard cross every day. I hope you, like many others before you, will seek the help you need to overcome it and be made whole.

What I’ve Learned

Over the past few days, I’ve been doing my best to research how to overcome fear. According to Wake Up Cloud, a blog I found with some very helpful hints, there are several things to combat your fears.

The author suggested to replace your fear with gratitude. While you are afraid to give a speech, it will calm your fears to take a deep breath and remind yourself that you are grateful to even be speaking to the audience at all. Gratitude, in my experience, can cure so many things. When you begin listing what you are grateful for, sadness decreases, anger disappears, and I have no doubt that fear will evaporate as well.

Another tip the author gave was to journal. I love journaling. Sometimes, I feel as though I cannot talk to anyone about my problems either because I don’t want to feel like a whiner, or because I’m afraid my friends won’t care. With a journal, you can at least get your thoughts outside of you instead of having them twist and twirl inside of you. Leaving your fears unsaid will leave you sick, so get them out.

This author also mentioned to try therapy, but this seems to0 obvious to me. Obvious and expensive. I don’t have the money to talk to professionals; however, if I did, therapy would be a great option.

The last point that I thought was interesting from this blog was to try yoga. I’ve never done yoga, but I’ve always been fascinated by it! This is the art of staying calm and finding inner peace. I think, this coming week, I would like to try yoga. That will be fun! Especially with midterms coming up. I could use a good stress relief.

The Date

This date lasted 3 hours longer than it should have. My date was very touchy, constantly trying to make me hold his hands, rub his shoulders, cuddle with him and so on. I am not touchy. I like hugs and cuddles as much as the next girl, but I wasn’t particularly attracted to this guy in the first place. Not only that, but I barely knew him! We had met once before and were set up on this date by my roommate.

The rock climbing place our group originally wanted to try out was closed. Thus, we drove half an hour to the next city over to find another rock climbing place. During this time, we also got lunch. At this point, my date had attempted to thumb wrestle me and asked for a hand massage which I declined to give.

Once we found our destination, I had to pay because my date was out of cash. I don’t mind paying for a date, but I’m kind of old school and I liked it when guys pay for me on a first date. That is when we were given helmets and ropes to strap ourselves in. Let me give you some background on this place. It was incredibly sketchy. The ceiling was dripping water which caused the foam ground to be soggy, you had to tie yourself into the safety harness, the lights flickered at random times, and you had to pay in cash.

The reason why I tell you this story was because I had to face my fear. Although heights were not my friend, I would have rather climbed a 20 foot wall straight up in a harness that I had to tie myself than stay another moment next to mister “wanna-thumb-wrestle?”.

Okay, maybe that example wasn’t the best, but I just think it is a funny story to tell.

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